Dear Girls...

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So since I did some status on Facebook about what girls should do, and should not; (and apparently famous) so I've decided to make a blog updates, specially dedicated for this... This 'Dear Girls' is actually inspired when I saw some girls took 'selfie'... No, I'm not opposing selfie, because I myself dis that too, hehe; but what's kinda annoyed me is that they took their pictures with their figures kinda 'appealing'...

And so I've decided to do this. And yes, it's a guy's perspective, mostly. So here you go:

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Dear Girls... 

"If you go for a date with guys, don't wear anything too sexy. You want to attract guys with your personality, not your boobs."

" If you like a guy, do give them a sign or whatsoever. Guys might misinterpret it... Just confess to them and hope for the best... ;)"

"Never ever never pay for anything during the first date... It's our pride to pay for the first date. #truefact"

"Real guy wanna girl who loves him sincerely... Not that she used him as a distraction to forget her ex-boyfriend..."

"A GUY never ever never ever had sex with his girlfriend, or whoever she is, even if she insisted; because he believes that a girls honour is a guys responsible, and should be preserved only to the right guy."

"There's 99.9 percent that the love line that you did under 18 could stand until marriage... I wouldn't say that it's impossible, and I do believe that another 0.01 percent has lived happily ever after...."

"For short girl, being tall doesn't mean you're beautiful... Most guys prefer short girls themselves. Why? Because they're cute... :3"

"If you girls wanna find a guy, pick someone who putted his whole effort to find the money for you to spend; rather than finding a guy who lavishly raining you with huge sums of money, FROM HIS PARENT..."

"If you're single, don't be discouraged. There's a lot more girl who doesn't have incapability to love others the way normal people do... So be grateful. #TheFaultInOurStars"

"Some guys are patience with their girl, but please don't piss off his feeling... You may find yourself regretting it someday later..."

***

Well, that's all I could think off... I'm sorry this is kinda short; but yeap...? That's all I could type. I'll promise you that as soon as I could think more, I'll be updating the 'Dear Girls' again... So, bye then. See ya in my next update... :)

***

bro-fist!

It's The Time.... ^_^

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And so here I am, staring at my beloved blog once more.... Who am I kidding....? Just skip the intro lah! No more fuzz....

It's The Time..... ^_^

 2nd of May 2013.... The day when I resolved to myself to wait for Miss That-Special-Someone for one whole year. Yeap! You heard that right! Officially single for one whole year just to wait for someone I think might be a worthwhile waiting. And there, I gone back to Limbang, hopefully that she might say yes, or at least reconsider the second chance. And I do stumbled a lot of obstacles, and it includes almost losing grips in my promises to keep single. But then, I got a hold on myself, and I still clinging on my promises being single just for her.

And here we go.... 2nd May 2014, after one years I kept myself being single; and here's what happened:

Two days after the 2nd May, I do received a call from Miss That-Special-Someone, and I do still the nervousness and awkwardness during the first few seconds of calling. To be honest, I am almost forget about the promises that I've done last year. But then, when she suddenly said that she would like to move on, I braced the impacts. And yes, the impacts are heart-strucking, as KurtHugoSchneider's 'Say Something' coincidently played throughout the whole conversations... I do felt much surprised that time, as I didn't expect it happens to be, well at least that time...

Here's what I felt right then: I didn't want to have a relationship that only based on feelings and I don't want my girl to also have that kind of attitude. Love based on merely feelings. No, I don't want those. I'm a guy that do commits to someone and yes, I'm a loyal one. So, I'm really picky and selective in finding the right girl, or at least the one that could accept me the way I am. Even when it took a few more years to discover one, so be it... Rather than having someone that still could felt loneliness instead of happiness, whenever she's by my side. 

So what's happened after the conversations?

Well, I do accept her flaws and I do accept her the way she is..... Together? That's a funny questions. Well, no; or not yet, or never will be again; but to be honest, I think I should proceed with who I am right now. Move on and accept her as a friend. My best, old-friend (since we've known for 7+ years) and with a little twists of dramas.... Hahahaha! xD

"But then, don't you regret trying to let go of all of this? After all those wailing, all of tears you shed, and ultimately sacrificing your one years just for her, when there's some girls are waiting for you, probably still waiting for that one little glimpse of chance to love you just the way you craved your love for her?" 
*sigh... That's tough. I once though that all of my life was all about her. What she is, what she like, what she went through, and what was she felt. But then, let's look at a more broader, more wider perspective. I actually didn't realised that there's someone else that really matters than her, well at least back then. Family, friends, and I mean a lot of friends; they meant a lot for me and I just didn't realised about that. So, why don't I just cherish the whole thing? Of course she's also important as she shaped my life like 45% of my life, but then I can't just ignored another 55% of who's that shaped me....  To be honest, I still do have feelings for her, and I still love her. But my love for her is already in a level where my love for her is the love of a friend, as a best, close friend...

And 9.04pm 5th May 2014, I officially letting her go, the way she had wanted. She already moved on, and I think I should too.... Another chapter closed, and new chapter was written. And it's called 'Being Single'... And I could assure you, that this chapter will be much longer than usual. And no, I don't want to have a relationship, well at least for another few years... Ouch!

***

So that's all.... I don't really mind being single. If I could survive for 2 years, then another 3 years? Bring it on, baby! Now let me love my friends, families, and my gadgets.... =3 See ya on my next updates!

***

bro-fist!

She'll Always My Queen...

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And so, the month of May... Where there's festive season, someone's birthday, but nothing compares to what will happen on the second week of Sunday! So without so much intro, let's head out to the main part shall we? :D

She'll Always My Queen....

*** 

And so after 9 months of nurturing love and care, and hoping that I'm a guy, finally on 17th June 1995; she brought me to the world... And after almost 19 years living here as a wanderer, my trust and my love always lies with her, and always start with her. And to be honest, every wrong that I've done mostly she'll fix it with every method available. Be it 'rotan' or counselling, or teguran or raging like Godzilla. Hahahahahahaha...... Godzilla. And it ain't a metaphor. It's surreal!

I still remember for the last seven years when my mum finally found out that I do had a crush, and she's raging like a Godzilla, telling me that I shouldn't took love so seriously, and never to put yourself in a situation where you'll just gonna be a dumbass, following what girls want just because I do have feelings for her. And yeah, when I do think back that time I really am naive and act through feelings only. Comparing myself now and then, we'll can't hide the pride within me as I gain soooooo much knowledge about life. And yes, it includes love as well. Let it with family, friends or opposite sex... Aluuuu kembang hidung kamek! Wakakakaka!!!

So, ma....? I just wanna say thank you so much for what you've done to me. Really what you've done to me then and now can't be compared to whatever I had and I could. And when they said a roll of Diploma or Degree would suffice your family, especially a mum; for me that's not enough. And when they said that a mum should wear a kebaya, or sarung, and act like you're already old; yet you still hold the title 'hot mama', driving Exora till exceed 140km/hour on the road, wear jeans instead of sarong, and always dreaming of having a Ferrari, instead of having a nice collections of recipe books... Whatever you did, or why you reacted like that; it's for the best for me, for all of us siblings... Your crazy, annoying, yet respectful an beloved children.

And ma, maybe less than 10 years you'll find yourself saw me with white tuxedo, and you would-be-daughter-in-law in front of the altar in the Church; and less than 15 years, you'll be a grandma and my children will running around you, just know that you're always the Queen in my life....

Happy Mama's day, Ma! Much love from me to you.... ^^

***

So, that's it! That's all for now... But before you close this blog, just give a hug to your mum, give her a smooch and say that you love her and always appreciate her from the bottom of your heart! A friendly reminder from your bro, DJ... :D

***

bro-fist!

New Job Already...?

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Haha... So much into blogging, and well, I admit I do blogging frequently now. But nah... Who give a damn anyway, right? Ahahaha... So everything is over. My first semester is over, I'm having my holiday down here at JB and guess what? I'm so freaking BOORRIINNNNNNNGGGGG.......! So what I did now? Here:

New Job Already?

8 April 2014 marks my days of freedom, stress-release and joy  after 4 months of non-stop learning and keep learning, mastering my skills in drawing and others related to the graphic industries. I was literally having my joy and smiles on my face, but sooner or later after few days, my schedules was full of DoTA, DoTA, and more DoTA, till sometime I get the chance to sleep on 3-4 am in the morning after the tournament has finished. Of course there's someone who always gave me advises to sleep early, (Thanks Miss That-Special-Someone) and I try to reduce my DoTA habit already. In fact, here's what I did.

Well after the DoTA habit decreases, I wonder to myself what am I supposed to do now? And so I grabbed my camera and took few snaps. And yes, I spend much of my times taking photographs of natures, landscapes and people now... Applying the principles of photography, both basic and advance and put it to good use. So, here I am: Darren Junior the Freelance Photographer.... :D

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Welcome to Malacca, as they say...

My senior over there.... :D

One of the best sight-seeing at Malacca, Christ Church

And here's one of my favorites...

Details, details and a beautiful details of flowers...

This is our CF Southern Johore Family.... So nice to meet them...

Spot the difference... Haha! XD

Sakura on the noon...

And my feet literally stepped on Korean land..... Haha... Jkjk.... XD

So, I put some of my pictures that I've taken, and I know some of it are not up to advanced standard, but hey? I'm still learning.... :D ..... So, gotta go, took my lunch before went to take some more pictures... See ya!

***

bro-fist!

'Cause I'm Inspired...

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Well, it's 2.30 am in the morning, and here I am; sleepless and and still awake despite the cold, blurred, heavy eyes of mine begging me to take a rest, but then after all weeks of pain, suffering and tears physically and mentally, eventually what I thought is right is somehow not right for others.... Nah, just kidding... So in the dark, I woke up headed to my lappy, playing the song "All Of Me" by John Legend and "Second Chance" by Hillsong United; and writing this blog update. So, here we go:

Cause I'm Inspired...

It's been a tormenting testing weeks for me as I going through my days as a human. As DJ; and gladly my first semester is done, so I could proceed with holidays, yeay......!!!! But then, God might had challenged me something. So many tests that he had thrown to me, and I was like "Bring it on, God!" and I eventually succeed in it. But then, this came out...

As I was having a 'long-distance, vowed-to-each-other, always-missing-you, complicated relationship' with my Miss That-Special-Someone, I was grown too fond. Much too fond towards her (and hopefully the same with me over there) that I'm looking forward too meet her soon. So soon that somehow it drives me insane! (Nah, it's just a metaphor, but you get the point right?) And really I am looking forward for that. Okay that's the first part...

The second part is during my stay AND study at Johore here, I promised to myself that I'll gonna be making, creating and composing a song. And I did... "Let Me Stay Here" and "Perfect You" by myself, and I had to say I'm pretty impressed by it, even for an amateur. (Like I haven't mastered finger-plucking but I will, owh yeah!) And I ask for a more advanced guitar skill with my seniors, mastering a more advanced chords. That's one of the promises that I've made to myself...
But then as time passes and I became more focused on my works, assignments and project, accidentally my artworks became a beautiful artwork, that my friends and even my PA gave a praise on those artworks. Owh how glad I am when they told me like that... :3

During February, Valentine seasons, the month of Love and Serenity I was inspired to just love one another, and yes, Miss Queen?  I just simply made her day, that I vowed to myself every Valentine I wanna spread the love, joy and happiness to just about everyone! And the chocolates, well call me old-fashion, but I still think that giving the chocolates mean that you wanna share the sweetness love could ever gave. And chocolates is the best choice to show it! : )

And now, only two weeks left before I'll be heading to Senai Airport, took my flight on 26 April 2014, across 30000 feet above sea level to Miri, Sarawak; I was pretty excited about it! *holding excitement... Miri, first thing I wanna do is to smell the scent of salty, modern scent of you! And I can't show what I've learned throughout my whole semester at Johore there!

***

There must be some of you asking why did I writing what I've learned at Johore here? Aren't there anything else to say instead of only myself? And yeah, you got a point, but that's not what are we arguing about. There's one quotes: "Behind every man's success, there's a women at his back" (One of my favorites as well) and here's why:

Remember when I said that I'm trying to learned a more advanced guitar skill? Well, that's because I was so driven to play guitar with Miss That-Special-Someone in front of me. I was motivated when other girls was like, "A guy is way more cooler when he could play guitar, and best case scenario: serenade in front of her with the guitar", and so I tried my best to master the guitar skill till I had to bandages some of my finger because the day when I played for few hours, my fingers went numb with minor bleeding. But for me, it's worth it. The song "Let Me Stay Here" and "Perfect You", well that was inspired by you. By our relationships that we had made for awhile now... And I seriously hoped that you'll appreciate it, even when my strumming was kind of bad... Sorry about that. I'm working on that...

Artwork that I've done? Well to be honest, I'm inspired by her too! Her facial, her glace, her smile, and how we lived our days and nights everyday has inspires me to create a beautiful artwork, that for me, simply elegant, beautiful yet simple... Simply describes you. Remember how I once said this: Among the stars, beneath the sky, that's where we are? Well, I've created a Post-Impressionism artwork based on that. And that's what I once said to her, Miss That-Special-Someone... And it become everyone's talk of the day that time... And who am I inspired from? It's you Miss That-Special-Someone.

How about the Valentine last two months? Okay, the reasons why I made a vow to spread the love with one another is that I've inspired.... Yes, I've inspired by you, Miss That-Special-Someone. I still remember 14 February 2008 when you first accept me as your boyfriend even when I thought back, I might still a stranger to you. And yet you received me. I do think that maybe on that moment, I knew my life would changed to a whole different things, but maybe if you didn't received my proposal, maybe I'm not like this... 

Yes, I've gone out with Miss Queen, celebrating Valentine with her, but hey? Valentine is the day where you literally want to spread love with one another, regardless of them as you see a stranger or not, well they do love love, right? So I'm inspired by her, Miss That-Special-Someone to made everyone's day that 14 February a lovely day, just because she once accepted me, even I'm a stranger that moment... : )

So am I excited to go back and see her once more? Heck yeah I am! I'm super excited to meet her, to have a non-stop chattering, the laser eye-to-eye moment, and just to show her like: Here I am, Miss That-Special-Someone. You inspired me to do what I thought I might get to think twice of. You inspired me to do a leap into something that I barely sure of, and yes I've done perfectly. You are the one who inspires me to be who I am, just because you want me that way, even there's the time when I wanted to changed, but then when I think back about how you loved me just because I'm like this, I decided to stay put... 

So whether it's Miss Ivy, Miss Her-That-I-Mentioned, Miss Two-Guys-Girl, Miss Queen, Miss That-First-Crush etc etc, all I want is that simple Miss That-Special-Someone who always loved me the way I am and still, and I always adore to and hopefully wish to be by her side for the rest of my life... Amen....

I would like to quote this to Miss That-Special-Someone from a book 'The Inner Voice of Love' by Father Henri J.M. Nouwen: You carry your own beautiful, deeply loved self in your heart. You can and must hold to the truth of the love you were given and recognise that same love in others who see your goodness and loves you...

***

So, that's all for this mor-night and gosh, I'm so into this blog updates that I didn't realised I've spend too much time writing this. So, for Miss That-Special-Someone, this is for you... All I wanna say that I appreciate, I cherished and I wanna say thank you for everything... Love you, miss you till the infinity and beyond! ;) 

***

(Gosh I should head back to sleep) Mornight, peeps... Bro-fist!

Am I Changing A Lot?

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And so we come to the end of March, and few more weeks left before I'll be off to Miri.... Yeay! Ok, maybe not so yeay, but you know after a while rite? Ok, serious time! In the midst of excitements and joy of enjoying my semester break, I came up thinking as my mind come across all of my friends I've made at Johore here. At there, I was thinking.....

"Am I Changing A Lot?"

Since I've moved here, from last year till now, I could see that I've changed. A LOT! Changed in my appearance, like I'm more sensible towards current fashion. That's undeniable, okay. Even I bravely changed my hairstyle with undercuts, mohawk, perming and even once dyed my hair to aqua blue due to the fashion show. (I had to, even when I enjoyed being having the same style with T.O.P. during his BigBang album, Fantastic Baby) Changed in physical, yeah as I'm gaining my weight already, from 55 kg, to staggering 64 kg. Ouch, that's a lot, but it doesn't really affect my appearance. Still slim and fit I am. K-pop, yeah, I'm more updating myself with K-pop news, especially dramas and Running Man, thanks to my 'same-headed' friends... But then, as I reflect myself on the mirror for a moment, suddenly tears went down from my cheek for no reasons. And in that precise moment, I'm inspired to write and composed a song. (But we're not gonna touch on that)

Physical, I've changed, but mentally? Inner? Games of emotion? I don't know, seriously... Am I fooling myself, or am I taking things so seriously? I've been pushed and pushed, and pushed to the limit, on the verge of: "Am I doing it right?", "Did I hurt someone?", "Do I indirectly trying to go to that dark, gloomy past, where in one point you tried to commit suicide?"...

See, when I came here, the pressure is really, really, really strong.... I don't think the small witted person could withstand it. Culture shock, racism, and faith has become the stake here as I'm trying to suit myself in the society, maintaining my belief and keep studying and gain more knowledge to achieve what I wanted to be.

From the start, I always wanted to be a good guy, having a good friends and three years later, achieving Diploma in Graphic Design. Amen... But then, it became vice versa. It's harder than it should be. I was living in a society where there's a dominant, and there's less dominant. Society that is heavily political mindset, and society that thinks their race is the master of all races, due to the culture and ethnic barriers. And somehow I had changed into someone who is more realistic, someone who already understood the ways of the world, the politics of my countries, and those who were hard-wired by it. In short, I've changed into someone who are protesting over this and that. Someone who tries to stand up for something, and someone who tries to straightening up my faith, my belief as a Christian...

Don't get me wrong. I become rebellious for the right thing... There's one point where one of my colleagues mocking me at the back, saying that Christian is no good, the spreader of hate, allies of Zionism who tries to sweep away other religions and hail them as the supreme race; and I was realllly f*****g pissed off and debated with her, till a point where I just slapped her and never talked to her again. RACISM!

And that's what I wanted to avoid, because I'm a guy who loves to befriend with all, ladies or guys, no matter their race, religion or even sexual orientation. I do have friends who are gays and lesbians and I don't even care what their favorites, because after all, they're humans who do have feelings... And this is what they mocked me from behind : "Good guys gone wild". A guy that close with girls more, charming them and luring them to the valley of sins, where he'll gonna strip their virginity off, because his religion didn't say something about it..... Mother f****r! Weih, ko siapa nak kutuk aku seteruk tu? Aku rapat dengan pompuan sebab dah memang lelaki pandang pompuan dulu. Pastu nak kata aku yang asal dari Sarawak yang memang open minded sampai open dengan benda zina macam ni? Are you so narrow minded?! Kamek orang Sarawakian memang jenis open, but mun pasal benda zina ni sik pernah kamek orang sentuh? Please lah? Kamek pun masih teruna juak, yang bena-bena sik mok embak orang lain dalam lembah zina tok.... Kau padah orang Kristian sik pernah dididik mengenai zina? Mun camiya, kenak perempuan-perempuan Poli sia senang dengan kamek? Mentang-mentang kamek sik rapat alu dengan lelaki nembiak iya, terus padah yang sik patut lah? Cuba nangga statistik kes zina, sumbang mahram, GRO, seks bebas camiya... Nangga negeri kamek dan negeri kitak, rasa-rasa siapa nait, siapa dibah sia? Dasar masyarakat perosak perpaduan...

***

(took a deep breath) Okay.... That's enough frustrations for now. But then, because of the societies like this, I had changed. Not to the worst, but then changed to someone that tries to oppose people and what they've done wrong. Especially racism... But then I was heavily criticized for what I think I've done right, saying that what I did is against the will of society. But who cares anyway. Because of the, I've changed into someone who fight for what I want. A true prosperous society, without any prejudice some sort.  

But then, when I looked back at what I used to: a good guy, with a good friends and wanted to have the Diploma in Graphic Design; that's where my tears dripped down...You see the whole concept, right?

***

Okay.... Done with the frustrations all those, and just gonna move on.... Stay strong, DJ, and you will soon prevail. Just remember that this is part of your struggle, a part of God's Great Plan. Just stay strong, DJ...

bro-fist... 

Missing You...

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Hey guys! How fare are you? Hope you're fine, cause I don't! Nah...... Haha... I don't really in the bad mood, but a little exhausted, and a slight part where I don't really take care of health much. Maybe because I'm studying and keep on studying, way tooooooooooooooo hard till I didn't really had time to exercise whatsoever. I even didn't really care of my diet either; as long as it gave me enough fuel to go through one whole day, that's enough for me.... And talking about 'enough', I think I'm way too far from the league. Haha... So, shall we move on to our topic right now? : )

Missing You.....

***

 Aight, so it's been a while since I left my beautiful, prosperous and ever-rich Sarawak in quest to search and absorb the power of knowledge. (Waseh, macam pendekar nak cari tok guru silat! lol) But it's true or what? I left, I learn from others and I come back here to develop my own countries, families and my *ehem.... Bakal famili suatu masa nanti. But in the midst of these opportunities, up's and down's of finding the knowledge required, I found and I realised something. No, for real I felt that something very common, and yet it feels like I felt for the first time. The feeling when you really wanted to stay close and just stay put at there. The feeling when you really wanted to just follow that whenever it goes. And for sure, that is a feeling of 'missing someone' , and yes, I really missing someone.

Ladies and gentleman; bloggers all,

And yes, I miss Miri; I miss my friends, close and far, old and just met; I miss the food; and I miss my families so dayum much. And what's funny is that the feelings of missing someone has become much and much more stronger, much more, like literally MORE missing them.... Really, there's nothing that could express the feeling of missing them all. But you know what? Beneath the lists of them all, there's also someone that I really miss really much. And guess who? Yeap, it's Miss That-Special-Someone....

"Among the star, beneath the skies; That's where we are...."
And when I take a moment of though, that is where I realised that I really missed  her so much. That kind of uncontained, ever-strong miss of someone become something that's really unbearable for everyone. Well, at least me, but you know that, right? That kind of missing someone, undescibe merely by words, and seriously I didn't really know what the heck am I writing, but you get the idea right?

Q : What is your reactions when you saw her after half a year?
Nervous, words lost, and I'm drifted in the fantasies for a moment.... But unicorns and rainbows will colour up the dull, black and white atmosphere! XD

Q : Do you still has a feeling for her?
Yes..... That's it....

Q : What makes you to miss her?
I'll say her smile. No, her eyes and how she gazed me. Nonono.... Her attitude, hmmm, maybe the way she talked. Maybe her appearance. Nah, her feature.... No, her cute expessions, you know what I say? But finally it'll end like this. I don't know why I kept missing her.... Seriously! After all those lists and lists and lists, I could just continue saying why I kept missing her, but the fact is I don't really has an accurate idea why I kept missing her. And to be told the truth, this feelings that I had just kept on going and going. And I'm gonna say like this, I live my days, I go through my days because of this.... This is why. I'm waking up, hoping that I could get a glimpse of her. Hoping that somehow she'll came to my Art History classes like an angel in the midst of mortals and suddenly sat besides me. Or somehow she sent a picture of her into my WeChat, or just a call would suffice.... And when the day almost finished, I always told to myself that there's tomorrow. And that tomorrow, I'm gonna see her once again, not realising that this is the day when I finally met her.

And when she'll say that she do has the same as I do, I'll be the luckiest one... : )

***

Aight, so that's it... So Miss That-Special-Someone, if you read this, maybe it solved your questions of why I kept called you, texting you and wechatting you... Because no matter what I said that time, no matter what kind of questions that I asked you that time, the true fact is that I missed you... And five weeks left before my flight to Miri, I hope that amongst the first one that I met after half a year, is YOU.... And I always told you before: "No matter how far we are, on night we're staying under the same sky, where we'll see the same night sky and pointed at the same star..." Trust me on that... : )

***

So, that's it.... Hope you enjoy and see ya in the next blog update! Goodnight and see ya!

***

bro-fist!

Temptations oh Temptations...

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Aight, since I haven't updated since a while, so I'll just gonna do not only one blog update, but TWO blog update! (Yeay!) So I'm here, I'm excited and if I could, I just wanna update it all of my days.... Hahahaha... Lol! And yes, many of you are wondering why one of the most disturbing words "temptations" came out? Well, it means something for the past few months since I've stayed here at Johore. Really... Wanna know more? Here's for you:

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Temptations oh Temptations...

Since 28th November 2013, I've been exposed to the land of Peninsular Malaysia, where everything seems so tempting. Let it be food, JDT, Legoland or Singapore, for me everything is tempting. Either this is my first time at Johore or it's my first experience after all the news I've read at the news and so on... And it feels sooooooo damn true! Owh gosh... Temptations.... (See?! That's first)

The second most tempting is the thing we love the most: FOOD! And yes, as a Sarawakian dude who sat somewhere far, separated by South China Sea, I've been given an allowance that's really not sufficient for my course, which is Diploma in Graphic Design. And everyone knows that anything related to Art is extremely expensive. Plus, after all things I gotta pay like house rent, electricity, water etc etc etc, there's not enough money for me to buy food like I used to. So I gotta subside my food expenses like 2 meals instead of 4-5 meals. And the meals mostly consist of bread and peanut butter, together with a glass of cold water. And seriously, watching those of my friends having their super delicious food, it's really tempting.... Temptations number 2...

The third one? Well it's the habit of SHOPPING WITHOUT DISCOUNTS. You heard me! Shopping without discount... Wait wait wait! Hold your thought for a moment! It's not that I'm a shopaholic! Nonono.... What I mean is that I bought something without even checking the price tags, because for me, what I think that is good and quality, I'll just gonna buy it, regardsless of their price... And yeap, I've once bought like 3-4 things with the price of more than RM200. Ouch!!! That's a pain in my wallet... And yet, the temptations of having a branded stuff without any glace at the price tag, it's....... really..... tempting.....! Temptations number 3... 

How about the fourth one...? Johore ladies....? I would say "nah..." They're not really tempting at all. Sarawakian ladies are the best one, for me! Hahahaha.... Not even a temptations by looking at them... LOL! XD

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Why did I wanna shoutout this really? Is it necessary to share about temptations? Aight, so about that, we gotta realise this: We're humans, and human tend to do mistakes, regardless of their statuses." And I gotta admit, I did one too, maybe even now I made some mistakes... That's undeniable. But since I had stayed at Johore here, far away for families, living here alone without any relatives; it's really hard, you know? And since I've exposed to so many temptations, yeah sometimes I do fall into those... But somehow when I made mistakes, I realised what I've done is wrong and I tried my best to undo it. And that's the beauty of mankind. Knew what they had done wronged and try to fix it back.... 

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So that's about it! My blog updates on March and don't forget to check out my second updates... And before I forget, never ever be afraid to fall into mistakes. Once we fall, the next one is the highest jump you'll ever leaped... Remember that, guys!

So, see 'ya on the next blog update! And thanks for reading! Kamsahamnida...

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Bro-fist! WeChat: iamdarrenjr

40 Days of Lent....

Hey hi ho, peeps and bloggers... Blogger man login and updating!

Before we proceed for a moment, let's pause for a moment and pray to our God so that the flight MH370 will be found, no matter what'll happen to it and the 200++ passengers and crews inside it.... 

Aight, so with Lent coming in front of our doorsteps, surely this is the perfect moment for us to reflect back what had happened for the last few moment, days, or even years... So this blog update is specially edicated to these. Ok, short intro. Let's head to the real deal, shall we?

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40 Days of Lent 

Aight, so since the last Ash Wednesday, I already resolved myself to you guys that I'll stay away from Facebook, meat and fancy foods for 40 days straight... And I knew I'm a sinner, so this kind of fast is isn't really my things, actually, since I'm a Facebook-holic, but since I've made a vow so I'll just stick to it! So many people asked why that, and not just focused on food instead? So this is it:

1. I wanna get rid of my Facebook-holic inside me.
2. Why must food? Why can't it be media social? I mean it's pretty addicting, right?
3. I wanna spend more on God, rather than sitting in front of my Lappy and liking, commenting and update my current status on Facebook (even when the missing flight MH370 is really tempting me to go into Facebook and just update statuses on Facebook about it) and yet I didn't... Yeay! XD

40 Days... I just gotta practice my voice during the Paschal Proclamation, simply because I was chosen to sing those during Easter Vigil.... And imagine singing those hymn for 10 minutes, alone, on midnight, and there's 5 pages of music notes I've to cope up? Well that's insan-........ That's a blessing, actually. It's an honor for me to sing those for the church, but for another 3-4 weeks, I've to cope up and cover those, that's gonna take some time to just memorize those. Really.... But what I know is God had chose me, so I'll just get along with it... Huhu.

Wish me luck, guys..... And have a blessed Lent.... Peace be with you.

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So, what's your Lent?

My 2014 Valentine...

Hey ho hi, peeps and bloggers.... Blogger Guy login and happily updating...

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Aight there, so hold your thoughts for a moment... I guess you might be wondering who's that girl over there that hold Cadbury chocolate and smiling sweetly over there, right? So introducing my 2014 Valentine date, Loretta Grace a.k.a. Queen Lola of LolaLand a.k.a. I'm her butler. (And seriously I'm not her servant. I'm too classy to say that I'm her servant) And yes I'll gonna update this blog about my 2014 Valentine. So here's goes nothing... :

My 2014 Valentine :D

It's 2nd February 2014 when I met Loretta for the first time. She was actually singing Psalm during the Mass, and I was really captivated of her. Not because she's mesmerizing or what, but she could sing the high note. As the mass ended and I was about to discuss about my turn to sing the Psalm two weeks later, the sister in charge of the choir introduced me to her and I learned that she just came back from Kuching. Well of course it's just a smile-replied-with-smile only and no communications at all.... Well, I just about to adjust my role as one of the choirs and she just came back from Kuching, so a smile? *shrug... Never knew that we'll gonna be collaborating for the Psalm... Learn from each others experiences before.

And then 12th February, during vocal practices before Youth Night, we were suddenly collaborating together with the other two vocal members for the upcoming event... At there I've learned a little bit more about her. About her educations, friends, social backgrounds, her likes and dislikes. And apparently we're sharing that one same, common likes: Mocha coffee....! And yes, she's single, she loves candies and like most women, she do likes everything related to Chocolates and all those stuff, and I said, "Wait a minute, doesn't she have any 'I wanna be a little bit skinny this year' resolutions something?" And to be truthful, I thought she's a little bit more matured, but then.... *laugh... she's really immatured. Not I mean that kind of immatured mindset, but the way she act... yeap, that kind of immaturity that I mean. That cute immaturity that I'm talking about...

And after the practices, I did something unthinkable... I asked her to be my Valentine date, and she just said, "Yeah.. Sure!"

As she's powerful and could take over the high note, and I could done the low note and so we're kind of made a good collaborations during our Youth Night last 14 February... And to show my appreciations I bought her a box of Cadbury, each with different flavor and I gave it simply to her... Hey, call me old-school because every guys gave a chocolate to his date, but I think it's romantic when you received a chocolate during that day... Speaking of that, I never get any chocolate during Valentine before after 19 years living in this world... And she happily accepted it, and I was satisfied with what I've done... Mission to spread love during Valentine - Success!

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So, when they asked me, "How is she affecting you right now?" I just simply answer like this:For the last few days before Valentine, I was so annoyed and so stressed out because of what I've been through that day. Plus, Valentine + Single + "Forever Alone" = Never gonna be a good chemistry. So I tried to ignore and don't care anything about having to celebrate Valentine at all... But this years Valentine, I felt quite far from home, far away from families, my besties, and Miss That-Special-Someone... So I think this years Valentine might be the most lonely Valentine ever... But then that one women who her name is Loretta Grace has changes my perceptions. Don't get me wrong... The moment I asked her to be my Valentine, I don't meant that I wanted her to be my girlfriend, no.... Never even I just wanted to play with her feelings. Seriously.... But I just wanted to know her more perhaps, and she's okay with that. And plus, I wanted to be that someone who she could just put her head on my shoulder and cry all the night... I wanted to be that someone that she could depend on. I wanted to be that guy who could gave her Choki-Choki whenever she craved of chocolate. I just wanted to be someone just like other girl had affected me.... Because when they thinked back and saw me and what I've done to her that shaped her life till what she is right now, she maybe smiled back and say thanks for what I've done... And that's a sincere opinion from my four-eyes view... 

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And since that day when I asked her to be my Valentine, I don't hate Valentine no more... 

And I've vowed to myself, every 14 February, I wanna spread love to just, anyone... 

So, to Miss Loretta Grace a.k.a. Queen of Lolaland, thanks for being my 2014 Valentine date... Enjoy sharing my time with you that day, and I really enjoyed being by your side... And I really hoped our relationship as an employee-butler will always be more prosperous... LOL! Hahahahaha! XD...

So that's it, guys... Hope you really enjoyed your Valentine this year and till next time!

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bro-fist!

09DRG13F2048

Hey hi ho, peeps and bloggers! Blogger Guy login and updating....

So sebagaimana saya sudah janjikan, so I'll gonna directly wanna describe a little bit more about this particular institute of mine.... Sorry if I didn't really have a intro, cause well,I can't figure out one. So, here it goes:

09DRG13F2048

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Aight, so selepas saya escape daripada "Terror of Form 6" yang sebijik macam filem SAW tu, saya telah ditawarkan ke Politeknik Ibrahim Sultan, Johor. And I was like "Owh, Poli.... *shrug. At least tidak jugak saya terseksa macam monyet sarkas..." But THEN, saya sedar bahawa saya bukannya pergi ke sebarang-sebarang Politeknik, BUT a Politeknik PREMIER! Di mana Politeknik Premier hanyalah EMPAT sahaja di seluruh Malaysia, plus nilai sijil Diploma Politeknik Premier sama taraf dengan universiti kerajaan, plus it's certified by International Quality Standard System. Dan punyalah mulut saya ternganga macam...... ternganga....  Honestly, it's an honour to be here, studying and achieving what I'll become.

So, minggu pertama di Politeknik Ibrahim Sultan...... It feels like HELL....! No, seriously....

Saya menjangkakan yang minggu pertama sepatutnya minggu yang paling 'friendly' di antara semua minggu. Sebab sebagai orang baru, we're expecting a warm welcome, kan? But then, mereka punyalah tengking kami, then denda pun tak berpada-pada. And the worst thing is, mereka senior layan kami orang batch Dec 2013 macam kami baru keluar sekolah menengah. And I was like kami sudah boleh consider boleh berfikir secara kritis dan analitis, bak kata orang.... But what to do? Kami memang 'freshie' and that's the fact we had to endure for one whole semester.

Apabila minggu MSK (Minggu Sual Kenal) berlansung pada minggu pertama itu jugak, apparently sayalah hanya antara TIGA orang Sarawak yang kini dalam batch Dec 2013, and I *ehem..... are the only native Sarawakian in that batch! You heard me! The only Bidayuh, Iban,Bisaya, Kayan, Kenyah, Melanau, Murut, Lun Bawang etc. etc.in my batch. At this moment, I was wondering if that's another sarcasm, or a honour to be the only native Sarawakian. Might be sarcasm..... I think?

Sepanjang minggu MSK, pelbagai dugaan serta cubaan yang sering kali menimpa kami, bak kat penulis skema novel Melayu, kan? And you know the hardest part throughout whole week: PENGGONDOLAN KEPALA SEHINGGA RAMBUT MENCECAH SATU CM!  Dan saya macam WTF !@#$%^&*()_+?! Dan pada pandangan pertama saya kepada cermin, saya lansung tak kenal reflection siapa itu... But then mungkin tempat lain, so adat mereka pun lain. So saya sapu sajalah sisa-sisa dia.. Literally, saya sapu sisa-sisa rambut saya yang cantik itu dan buang ke dalam tong sampah... So pada time tu, saya telah bersumpah time gambar saya di-post-kan dalam Facebook, mesti ada topi... (That explains why I frequently use my black fedora hats and Ironman cap)

Tetapi ketika masa cepat berlalu dan saya makin kenal perangai orang sini, semakin saya rasa serasi....You know? Jumpa orang Jawa face-to-face, ada room-mate orang India, then berkawan dengan orang Cina yang pekak bisu, really broadening my experience to a whole new level. Macam this is not what I really expected, actually. So secara rasminya saya kini belajar segala paper dalam DRG (Diploma in Graphic Design),bahasa isyarat, and a bit of Javanese. hahaha!

Owh yah, aim saya sepanjang tiga tahun study sini ialah agar supaya saya dapat keseronokan ketika belajar, and I just wanna prove societies that Politeknik graduants could contribute something to societies. Really... That's what I really wanted the most! And change a little bit more Peninsular Malaysian perspective toward us as Sabahan and Sarawakians, that we could do something that normal Malaysians can't do..

So sekarang ni saya adalah sebahagian daripada EXCO Jabatan Rekabentuk dan Komunikasi Visual, comitee member of PIS Christian Fellowship, penghuni kamsis High-Tech 3,ahli KBIM (Kelab Bahasa Isyarat Malaysia) , freelance photographer, Youth St. Theresa, Masai, and a proud students of Graphic Design at Politeknik Ibrahim Sultan.

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So that's it! So what's about the title this blog update...? Well it's actually my Matrix card number, so I think that might be the best title untuk kali ni... Sarawak? Of course I missed Sarawak! Missed Sarawak so badly that I didn't even care to pay a lot more money just to buy the tickets. But what to do? The only things that separates me and Sarawak are South China Sea, and financial capabilities. So,sad to say yang saya takkan sambut CNY tahun ni dengan family saya. Sama macam last year,but that's fine with me... I'm okay with that.... I guess? Yam Seng sorang-sorang, bagi dan terima ang pau sorang-sorang, dan habiskan satu kotak limau mandarin sorang-sorang... What to do, kan? (I'm really craving for Laksa Sarawak, Kuih Lapis and Manuk Pansoh really right now)

So, I guess that's it! See ya!!! 

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bro-fist!